Advocating for Women Veterans Through Storytelling and Support Networks -30

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Kim [: 00:00:03

From a shy, quiet student to a trailblazing air force civil engineer, Amanda Huffman's journey is nothing short of inspiring. She's now on a mission to share the untold stories of women in the military and empower the next generation to serve with confidence and purpose. Join us as we dive into her incredible transformation, her deployment to Afghanistan, and the work she's doing today to pave the way for women in uniform. This is an episode you don't wanna miss. Welcome to Dog Tag Diaries, where military women share true stories. We are your hosts, Captain Kim

Dakota [: 00:00:44

And Captain Dakota. The stories you are about to hear are powerful. We appreciate that you have joined us and are eager to learn more about these experiences and connect with the military women who are willing to share their stories in order to foster community and understanding.

Kim [: 00:01:01

Military women are providing valuable insight into their experiences, struggles, and triumphs. By speaking their truth, they they contribute to a deeper understanding of the challenges they face and the resilience they demonstrate.

Dakota [: 00:01:16

We appreciate your decision to join us today to gain insights and knowledge from the experiences of these courageous military women. Thank you for being here.

Kim [: 00:01:32

Amanda Huffman is a former Air Force civil engineer, a military spouse, and the creator of Women of the Military podcast. Amanda served in the air force from 2,007 to 2,013, including a deployment to Afghanistan. Today, she's a passionate advocate for women in the military, inspiring the next generation through her podcast and her book, a girl's guide to military service. Amanda is a mom of 2 boys and an avid runner training for a marathon and enjoys spending time in her garden or reading. And welcome, Amanda. Thank you for being on Dog Tag Diaries.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:02:09

Thanks so much for having me. I'm excited to be here.

Kim [: 00:02:12

Yeah. And you know what? I really appreciate it because after reading that bio, you're a super busy woman, and trying to get you scheduled was tough because you're training for a marathon. Is that correct?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:02:25

I am. I'm regretting it. And what marathon? Walt Disney World's marathon.

Kim [: 00:02:32

No way. Have you ever done that one?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:02:34

No. This is my first marathon. I've done runDisney races, but only halfs.

Kim [: 00:02:39

Okay. Oh, wow. So this is you're really challenging yourself.

Kim [: 00:02:44

Do you have a partner you're doing it with?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:02:46

I'm doing it with 2 friends that I deployed to Afghanistan with, but they don't live local, so we I'm doing it the training part by myself, but we're texting each other to encourage each other.

Kim [: 00:02:57

Oh my gosh. That's awesome that you still have that community from your military deployment.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:03:04

Yeah. We're I'm really it's a really special group, so I'm excited.

Kim [: 00:03:10

Yeah. Well, I do wanna get into all that, but, of course, we have to start with knowing little Amanda, what you were like as a child.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:03:18

I was pretty shy and not very ambitious. I think I was just kind of, like, going along with life's path and didn't really know what I wanted to do. My dad is a gardener, and so I would move on with him. That was my first summer job. And he told me, if you don't go to college, then you're gonna do this for the rest of you guys. So I was like, I'm going to college. I'm not gonna do this because this is not fun. My mom was a teacher, but, like, we didn't have a lot of, like, what career options there were to go to college.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:03:53

So I had, like, no idea what to do. I really liked math and science, but I didn't know about engineering or, like, different paths. It was like, oh, I'll just be a math major because I like math. And it's like, no. There there's a bunch of other stuff. And so I kinda was lost and didn't even know, like, what possibilities were until I started school.

Kim [: 00:04:14

And where did you grow up? What state?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:04:16

In California, in the Central Valley.

Kim [: 00:04:18

Oh, okay. And that's where you you still are?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:04:21

Yeah. Now we're in Southern California. So I was farther north, but, yes, still in California.

Kim [: 00:04:27

Okay. So it's somewhat familiar to you. And did you have any military people in your family?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:04:36

Not, like, recently. My great uncle served in Vietnam, and my grandfather had served in World War 2, but no immediate connection to the military at that time.

Kim [: 00:04:48

Yeah. So did you even know that was an option growing up?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:04:52

No. I was talking to someone about how, like, September 11th happened and the military responded, and I was like, there's a military? Like, I had no idea. Like, I thought when there was a war, they would just, like, draft people and, like, make a military. And so that was kind of my understanding of the military. And then September 11th obviously changed that. But I didn't even really consider I didn't know that it was an option because it wasn't even on my radar at all.

Kim [: 00:05:21

Yeah. That makes sense. And so when 911 happened, did that capture your attention to be like, oh, maybe I should go in?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:05:29

I captured my attention and, like, you know, I was a senior in high school, and it changed the world we were living in. But I wasn't like, oh, this is for me. And my parents even said because they could tell I I was, like, needing direction. Like, maybe you should join the military. And I was like, no. No. That's not a good idea. But my freshman year of college, a bunch of my friends were either enlisting, someone was in the National Guard and was about to deploy.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:05:57

Another friend was doing a reserve officer training core program. So I like all these friends around me who are joining, and they were what influenced me to join.

Kim [: 00:06:06

Oh, okay. And since you were an athlete, the PT test, the physical training test probably came easy to you. Yes?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:06:16

The running part, yes. I had never done push ups and sit ups really.

Kim [: 00:06:22

Oh, you were an avid runner?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:06:23

Yes. I ran cross country in track, so I've always been a runner. When I I started, I did ROTC, so I I went to college and I went to the open house they had in the spring. And then in the fall semester was in it, like, kicked off. And, like, I spent the whole summer learning how to do push ups and sit ups and practicing running, so I was ready.

Kim [: 00:06:46

Yeah. And why the Air Force?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:06:50

I think the Air Force was what people said I should do, and it just felt like the right fit. My friend who was doing ROTC, which is a program you do while you're going to college and you end up commissioning at the end. He was doing Air Force ROTC, and the other option was army, and everyone was like, don't join the army. Don't join the army. Hey. I'm army. It's okay.

Kim [: 00:07:16

But if I was to do it all over, I would probably go into the air force.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:07:19

So those were, like for ROTC, it was army or air force, and my friend was in the air force, and everyone was like, yeah. You should do the air force. And so I started there, and then I just really fell in love with the program.

Kim [: 00:07:31

Okay. So you graduated then from college with engineering?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:07:37

Yeah. Civil engineering.

Kim [: 00:07:38

Okay. And that's where you got placed I'm not sure what they call it. Is it AOC, area of concentration for the air force, for your job title?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:07:49

It's AFSC, air force specialty code.

Kim [: 00:07:52

Okay. So it's different. What was that number in alphabet?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:07:57

Civil engineer is a well, it was. It maybe it still is. It's a 32e3g.

Kim [: 00:08:03

Okay. And what was your job like being a civil engineer?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:08:08

In the beginning, I was working in the environmental shop, and I the lady who was in charge of me, she's a civilian. I don't think she knew what to do with me. So, like, I didn't really do anything unless there was, like, a spill response, then they would I had a phone that I had to carry, and they would call me, and then I would go. But that didn't happen very often. And so I started going. There were a bunch of shops in the civil engineering squadron that do all the construction on base and, like, do different repair calls. And so I would start going out to the different shops and, like, hanging out with the enlisted troops, and they would teach me, like, the things they were doing. We had, like, a structure shop, and we had different we had all these different places.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:08:50

And so they would take me out, and I would get to learn about what they were doing. And then, eventually, I got to move to the engineering side, and then the f 22 was coming. And so there was all kinds of infrastructure projects on base, so we would drive out and, like, see it. And it was really fun.

Kim [: 00:09:08

What's the f 22?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:09:11

It's the fighter aircraft for the Air Force. It was pretty new when I joined the Air Force. Now I guess it's old, but I don't know. It's it's an airplane. It's a fighter jet.

Kim [: 00:09:25

You were still learning the ropes.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:09:27

Yeah. The f 117 was it is a stealth fighter, and it was being retired. And so they were replacing it with a new airframe, which was the f 22. But then the f 22 went somewhere else, and now they don't have it. So, anyways, lots of back end politics stories, but that's yeah. There was a lot going on construction wise for all the work that need to be done.

Kim [: 00:09:49

Okay. So then they did find a space for you.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:09:52

Yeah. After about a year, they moved me to the engineering side, and then I got to do a lot more stuff. And then about a year after that is when I deployed.

Kim [: 00:10:00

Okay. Tell us, where did you deploy? What was it like?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:10:05

So I deployed to Afghanistan. I got the lucky adventure of deploying with the army and realizing I really didn't wanna I know. I figured you're drinking water. I didn't really wanna be in the army, and I learned why. No. And so I so the army civil engineers are different than the air force civil engineers because army civil engineers don't actually have to have a civil engineering degree because they do, like, basic structures really just to move the army forward because the army's mission and role is to, like, always be moving and, like, attacking the next force. And so they do, like, a lot of temporary structures, whereas the air force is all around airplanes. So we build runways, we don't move, we try and, like, maintain the base.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:10:50

So the civil engineering required to maintain a base is a lot different than, like, army engineers, and the army also has the corps of engineers. So the PRT, provincial reconstruction team, was a mix of navy and air force teams. There were, like, 12 each, I think, of it, like, fully air force, fully navy, and then they all had army attached to them. And that was, like, the infantry was with us. And so we would go out and meet with the local Afghan population and try and help them with, like, infrastructure projects and nation building and all kinds of crazy stuff. And so that was, like, our main goal. I don't know if it worked, but that's what we were doing in Afghanistan.

Kim [: 00:11:36

Were the Afghans receptive of that?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:11:40

Our province was kind of weird. It was really small, but it was very like, it was posturing in the south, which is more anti American and Tajik in the north, which is more pro American. So, like, and even, like, their treatment towards women was very different in their culture. So it was like, when we went north of the base, it was like people would interact with us. They were happy to see us, and we had a lot of infrastructure projects there because there were so many people. But, like, the south, we couldn't even drive south. We would have to drive to Bagram and then down to Kabul and then back up through the bottom just to get there. So they said it was really a small province, and I'm like, but we drive quite a lot to get to different places.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:12:25

And so, yeah, we would have to go over the Khyber Pass. It was crazy. And even when we would come up from Kabul, you could tell the people down there were very different than the people up north and how they treated Americans. And so it kind of just depended on where we went and what kind of project we were doing. And there were a lot of places in we were in Kapisa that, like, we were not allowed to go to because they were like, no. This is not safe. You can't go to this area. They don't like Americans, and you're like a peacekeeping mission, so don't go there.

Kim [: 00:12:58

Well, thank goodness you had people to direct you and tell you. Yeah. Hey. Don't be going to that place.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:13:05

I mean, that's why everyone who deploys is so important because, like you said, like, just because you're not out on the front lines doesn't mean that you're not playing an important role of keeping the war fighter safe and intel analysts and all the things that were going on behind the scenes to help protect us before we even left the base.

Kim [: 00:13:24

Yeah. And now you're in this foreign country. And like you said, down south, it wasn't very safe for Americans, but how about for women? Did you find challenges as a woman in the military?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:13:37

Personally, I did not because they someone said it's like they have 3 sexes. They have, like, men. They're all the same, and then they would have Afghan women, and then they'd have American women. And it was kinda like, we don't really want to deal with American women, but we have to. So we're gonna, like, not classify them exactly as women. And so I was lucky I was deployed with another female civil engineer, and so they only had 2 females to deal with. And so they didn't have a choice, and I they wanted to get paid, and so that and I think it was 2010. So we had also been there a long time, and so they were just, like, used to the fact that they would have to work with women.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:14:15

And I think the funniest thing was they there was some, like, cultural differences because neither of us had children and we both were married. And that the Afghan culture at the time, it was like you had to have a baby within a year to show that the woman wasn't broken. And if you didn't have baby, then you're broken. And so they were like, you guys are broken. And it was just like and we're like, well, actually, like, we're using birth control. They were like, no. You have to prove you're not broken, then you can use birth control. And so it was interesting to, like, hear their I wasn't offended because it was just their culture and it was different, and we kinda thought it was funny.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:14:56

But I think that was, like, the biggest thing. They were just like, you don't have kids. That's a big problem. And we're like, but it's on purpose. You know?

Kim [: 00:15:06

Well, I love that you were able to make light of the cultural discrepancies. I mean, we're all just brought up in different areas. Even in the United States. Right? Like, we all have different ideas and perceptions, but going over to a different country definitely brings on nuances and like, we were talking about the cultural discrepancies. But were your male counterparts protective of you and the other female?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:15:33

Yeah. They were very protective. Like, I mean, the infantry, that was their job to keep everyone who is not infantry safe. And I know that as women, they kept they were more concerned about, like because there was a, like, big stigma. It was 2,010. You know, women weren't supposed to be in combat. So it was really important for them to keep us safe, and we didn't have the same type of training that they did. But they also the infantry were the ones the guys who they taught me how to talk on the radio.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:16:03

They taught me, like, you know, like, when we go over a bridge, we need someone to open the door because for safety reasons, you don't want it locked. And so, like, they taught me things they needed me to do to help them do their job, but then they also, you know, did their job. So it was like a collaborative effort. It wasn't like, oh, you just sit there in the corner. Don't say anything. Don't do anything. Instead, they were like, oh, we need you to know how to talk on the radio because sometimes we would be inspecting roads, and I'd be like, hey. We need to stop.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:16:30

And they were like, you have to stop, like, grabbing the leg of the the gunner and telling them, we gotta stop, because then they would have to go back. And so they taught me, like, all these things that, you know, I hadn't ever learned, and they were like, we just wanna hear a woman's voice on the radio. And so it was really funny. They had, like, ulterior motives, but they also were really trying to help me because they needed me to be able to do my job. And so I felt really part of the team and no, like, discrimination in that aspect.

Kim [: 00:17:03

That's so awesome to hear. I love that they utilized you and integrated you into their workspace.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:17:09

Yeah. No. It was great.

Kim [: 00:17:10

That had to feel good. And so how long were you deployed for? 9 months. And you said you were married, so that comes with some stress.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:17:20

Yeah. But we didn't have kids. Yeah. So that that made it easier. I'm still married to him, so we figured it.

Kim [: 00:17:29

Were you able to communicate with him on a regular basis?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:17:33

I feel so old even though I it's not that long ago, but we didn't have Wi Fi until, like, right when I left, and they only had it at ballroom and I was at a fob. But we did have a morale tent, so there were, like, 10 computers that you could use. And I think my husband and I would talk about once a week via Skype. That's also dating me. Skype. And we would send emails back and forth to communicate. And then, yeah, and then we would Skype every, like, every week, and I Skyped with my parents too. And so that was, like, our main way to communicate.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:18:10

And then sometimes we would do handwritten letters, so we have some handwritten letters back and forth. And so we had, like, lots and lots of modes of communication, and so we utilized as much as we could.

Kim [: 00:18:22

Speaking of handwritten letters, do you remember? And I feel like we may be the same age since we're talking Skype and handwritten letters to but do you remember the army well, military stationery? At least the army had it, and it had little, like, cartoon figures and military sayings on it, and it was so dang cute. But mail call was so wonderful. You're like, what mail call? One piece of mail in, like, 3 or 4 weeks? This is amazing.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:18:52

Yeah. No. Mail Call was always great. Yeah. And I know and they don't do that really anymore because, like, even at basic, you get your phone on the weekends or on Sunday or whatever. And I'm like, it was so nice to just get, like, a letter every once, and then you still have those letters. And, I mean, having your phone is probably nice too, but I don't know. It's kind of I think in the aspect like, I see the pros of, like, people having their phones and not having to phone call or and all that stuff, but also, like, it was nice to be insulated and not distracted by the world while you're at basic training.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:19:27

You're just getting through each day. So I don't know. It's, like, good and bad.

Kim [: 00:19:32

But totally different generations. Right? That's all we knew back then was at least that's when I when I was in back in 95. That's all we knew was, like, you're getting your mail, handwritten letters. But I think that's why they came up with such fun stationery back then.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:19:48

Yes. They were like, we have to do it.

Kim [: 00:19:50

Yes. So you stayed there for, you said, a year or 9 months?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:19:56

Yeah. It was a year total with training, and then I came back.

Kim [: 00:19:59

You returned back to your base?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:20:02

Yeah. I'd moved to Ohio while I was in Afghanistan. We bought a house together while I was deployed. It was awesome.

Kim [: 00:20:08

Oh, so he's in the military as well?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:20:10

Yeah. He's still in.

Kim [: 00:20:12

Okay. So you came back, and he was already somewhere else. Oh my gosh. Talk about all this because this has to be a lot of stressors on you.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:20:21

Yeah. So I came back, and he had left a bunch of stuff, like a bag or suitcase at my friend's house, and she came and picked me up from the airport. And then I am processed into the base because that's what you're supposed to do. Got my week of or so of r and r. I think I don't know. The air force gives you, like, 10 days or something like that.

Kim [: 00:20:41

I will not make comments about the air force.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:20:44

And then near the end of that, it was, like, almost Thanksgiving because I was gone from November 6th to November 1st. So I went to see my husband in Ohio for Thanksgiving, and by January, I was living in Ohio. So I, like, came back from in processing in and getting and then it was like, time to out process. So my commander was dual military at the base I was stationed at, so he was able to help get me assignment where my husband was, and that's why it was, like, so quick. And he even had, like, the timing right. Give you, like, a month to get in and then a month to get out. And so it worked out really well, and I'm really grateful that I had him because I was like, I don't know what I'm gonna do. I'm not gonna keep staying in if I can't get stationed where my husband is, but he was able to pull some strings.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:21:40

And he knew the right people because he was dual military. So

Kim [: 00:21:44

Yeah. So you ended up in Ohio. And how was that reintegrating back into society and then back into your relationship with your husband?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:21:55

It was challenging. It was lonely. I think that was the hardest part because I went from being, like, surrounded by people. And then I moved to Ohio. There were 6 inches of snow on the ground when I got there, and nobody was outside because it's Ohio in the winter. People don't go outside. And I think I had, like, one friend that we would, like, occasionally get to see each other because she wasn't working and I was working. And my husband was going to school to get his master's, so he was studying a lot.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:22:27

So it was, like, a really slow reconnection process for us, which I think in a way was good because we had, like, all that time to, like for me to adjust being back and for him to adjust to having me back. And so I think it was hard, but it also worked out fine because it wasn't just, like, in your face, like, together all the time. And so that was pretty seamless. And then it just was really lonely because I was working at headquarters and I was a lieutenant. I was supposed to pin on captain soon, but most of the other people who were working there were majors and lieutenant colonels. So it was not like I could hang out with them, and there was a lot of civilians. So it was just really hard to adjust. And then I have PTSD.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:23:18

I didn't know that. And so there was a lot of that, like, happening in the background as well, but I was trying to just suppress it all. And so that was, like, just suppressed a lot of emotions. But don't do that because then it comes out in bad ways.

Kim [: 00:23:32

Yeah. Well, let's talk do you mind talking about that? What are some of the things that you were experiencing that you were like, oh, wait. Hey. This doesn't feel right?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:23:41

So when I was still in New Mexico at my first assignment, like, during the, like, in processing and, like, the r and r, I went to go have lunch with someone, and I had to walk across an open field. And I, like, knew I was in the United States, but I could not stop checking for mines and, like, making sure it was safe. And so I knew and I went and I talked to a therapist after that, and she was like, we just got back. It's fine. And so yeah. I know.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:24:11

So that was, like, my first red flag, and that therapist telling me that I was fine really messed me up from getting help because I was like, well, you're fine. Because she said, you'll just adjust. It's just gonna take some time. Like yeah. I liked how your face, like, reaction was, like, so different than hers because I told her the exact same story, and she was just like, well, you just got home. It's not a big deal. And then it really started to come out in, like, anger when my children were born because I was sleep deprived, and I wasn't, like, able to, like, compartmentalize it. And so that's when I was like, there's something wrong with me.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:24:47

I need to get help. And so I was able to start going to group therapy and eventually did 1 on 1 therapy. And and now I have, like, all these tools, and I'm a lot better. But that was like I was able to, like, compartmentalize it and just kinda, like, push it down until, like, I was so tapped up. Being a mom is really hard, and it just all came out in negative ways. And so

Kim [: 00:25:11

Yeah. Well, I'm happy you ended up getting group help. Was your command supportive of that? Did they notice that and help you navigate through all that?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:25:22

No. Because I didn't I didn't get help until after I got out of the military. Because I when I had my son, I also got out of the military, so that added extra stress.

Kim [: 00:25:32

What made you get out of the military? What deciding factor?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:25:37

I think I knew there was something wrong with me because, like, deploying again, especially, like, leaving behind us at the time, I would have been a 6 month old, and I would have likely deployed, would be really hard. And I just would have remembered how hard the deployment was. And I couldn't put into words why it was hard, but I could just tell you, like, I don't think I can do it again. And I didn't realize, like, that mental strain. I just thought it was, like, physically taxing and but the emotional part was what my body was like, you can't do that again. And so when I thought about, like, leaving behind a 6 month old, my husband being in the military, him having to take care of my son, and I just was like, I don't think I can keep doing this. And so I decided to get out when I got pregnant. It was really hard.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:26:25

Like, I had no idea what was coming.

Kim [: 00:26:28

Yeah. It is really hard, but I'm so proud of you that you were able to, like, tap into yourself and at least, like, follow your intuition. Even though you couldn't put things into words, you're still like, ah, something's not right, and I really I'm not gonna go and leave my 6 month old again. And

Amanda Huffman [: 00:26:46

Well, I made a list, and it was like, why do you wanna stay? Because I want to. And then it was like, why do you wanna leave? And I was like, oh. Like, you know, it's like my body is like, I can't figure out why to stay. There's like nothing down the nothing done once even though I, like, kinda wanted to stay, but it was like, if you wrote it all down, it's like really challenging for my family, deployment again. Like, even my husband and I had curve fills, and it was hard to get stationed together. That and it was only gonna get harder. So it's like, what more sacrifices? So it was easy to come up with reasons to leave, and so that was if you're ever trying to figure it out, write a list and your brain will tell you what maybe your mind can't figure out without writing it down.

Kim [: 00:27:29

That is great advice because, right, after 6 years or even, like, 1 or 2 years, you it just becomes a conditioned lifestyle. So you're like, oh, this is what I'm kinda supposed to be doing, and it's just conditioned in your body. So the fact that you were able to write that list down Yeah. And come up with, you said, one pro?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:27:48

I feel like there was, like, 1 or 2, like, really good pay. You know?

Kim [: 00:27:52

Oh, yes.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:27:53

I like my job. Okay.

Kim [: 00:27:55

So you got out of the military. Bravo for you for following your intuition. And you have 2 children?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:28:04

Yeah. 2 boys.

Kim [: 00:28:05

And what do you do now?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:28:09

So I host a podcast called Women on the Military. It's has over 300 episodes, and they've been focused primarily on women who are serving in the military and sharing their stories, so I've been doing, like, episodic interview episodes. I'm kind of don't know what's gonna happen next, but I'm leaning towards doing more like me talking about different current events related to women, because I feel like with a lot of changes that may be happening in January with a new president, just some of the things that I've been seeing, like, in the women veteran community and different things that have happened over the years, I feel like there's topics that I'm not saying I have a unique perspective on, but I do have, like, a lot of stories of women that I've heard, and I've done a lot of research about joining the military. So I wanna take my experience, and I already do some freelance writing and maybe start doing more, like, episodes. But it's December right now when we're recording, and I'm still trying to flesh it out. So we'll see what happens. I'm still trying to figure out what's next for the podcast, but I really have loved getting to interview women, meet women, tell their stories. So I'm just trying to figure out what's next because I'm so busy, like you said, that I'm like, I can't even figure out what's next, but that's been now that I'm pretty much done recording and starting to figure it out, I'm, like, feeling a pull to start doing something like that.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:29:42

So we'll see what happens. But either way, the podcast, those 300 episodes are gonna be on, you know, Apple Podcasts and out there's app podcast, Spotify, wherever you want.

Kim [: 00:29:53

Tell us the name of it again.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:29:56

Women of the Military.

Kim [: 00:29:57

Women of the Military. Okay. And we will have that in the show notes as well. But I think that's so important that you're advocating for women in the military sharing their stories to inspire the next generation. Yeah. So talk about that a little bit. How did all this come into fruition?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:30:15

So I started focusing on deployments in 2017, a long time ago, And so I was looking for a way to share stories about what it was like to be in the military, but I had written a lot about my own deployment. And I was like, I don't know what else there is to say. And so then I started asking other people. And when I did my open call, it was almost all women who responded, and it kind of reminded me or maybe made me realize, like, I was as a woman in the military, me asking other women to share their stories, it kind of gave them an open door to share their stories. And at the time, there was no one talking about women veteran stories, like, as a podcast. I was like, mine was the first. I know I'm like, I'm not bragging, like Yeah. So you should brag.

Kim [: 00:31:06

Yes. Brag.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:31:08

So someone told me they were like, no. I did research. You were the first. I was like, I'm not trying to, like my podcast about women in the military was the first women focused podcast about women veterans, and and now there's a bunch, which is so exciting. And so that's the other reason why it's like, I can pivot to something new because there's now there's other people doing the work that wasn't being done. And so that was kinda how it started. I wanted to share stories, but I didn't realize that I needed it, like, personally. Like, remember I was talking about, like, how I was alone and like, I needed to connect with women veterans.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:31:44

I needed to hear their stories. I needed to hear about how everyone else had such a hard transition. And so it was a really healing thing for me. It was I went through the 12 steps. It was, like, my 12 step of, like, giving back, but also, like, getting so much from it. And so that was, like, where the whole like, it was part of my mental health journey and everything came together.

Kim [: 00:32:08

I was just gonna ask you that because you talked about writing your story and then telling your story. Do you feel like that was therapeutic for you as well?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:32:18

Yeah. I mean, it's been really therapeutic, especially when someone, like, emails you or you get to do a podcast interview and they're they're, like, talking and you're like, they're saying the exact same words that I feel. You know? And, like, I thought the reason that transitioning was so hard was because I did it wrong, because I got out of the military and I became a stay at home mom, and I didn't get a job. So, like, obviously, it was gonna be hard for me because I didn't do what the military wanted me to do, because, like, CHAP was all about get a job, get a job. So when I started talking to other people who did it right, you know, they got a job and they still were having challenges, and they were saying the same thing that I was feeling, it really helped me feel like, oh, it wasn't that I did it wrong. It's just that it there's a lot of emotions, and the military is not good to talk about emotions. And so it was it was very therapeutic.

Kim [: 00:33:08

And let's talk about the importance of the representation and the mentorship for these women. I know you do it through the podcast, but what else do you do for mentorship?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:33:20

I wrote a book called A Girl's Guide to Military Service, which is to help girls who are considering joining the military. And so it's supposed to help you decide if the military is right for you and also give you a strong foundation for joining the military because I feel like the most important thing you need to have when you join the military is you need to have all the facts. You need to know you need to know what branch is right for you, what type of service is right for you, you know, enlisting officer, career field, like everything. And then you also need to be, like, financially responsible, mentally aware, and emotionally with, like, relationships. So I try to get that as, like, a strong foundation. I did start a mentorship program, but I had a lot of challenges. And I did get to connect some people, but that's probably also something that I would love to, like, relook at and figure out how to make better. If I step away from podcasting every week, I'll have more time to figure that out.

Kim [: 00:34:21

There's so much to do. Right? As an intelligent, capable women, there is so much that we are capable of that you're just like sometimes you're like, wait a second. I wanna do this and that, and mentor, and podcast, and write a book, and do all that, and then run a marathon and be a mom and be a wife.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:34:41

Yep. There's a lot. Yeah. I mean, I have a strong passion for women who are considering joining the military, and that's, I mean, that's why I wrote a book because I put so much of myself and so much of the stories that I captured into the book. And I really feel like that is a good, like, mentorship tool, and people can always reach out and ask me for advice. And I'm connected to Women Veteran. So, like, if people reach out to me and I don't know the answer, I can connect them to people. And so I think it works better to have it, like, as, like, an informal process than having it formal right now.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:35:16

But, I mean, I love sending my book out to people when they tell me, like, oh, my friends. I'm like, oh, well, they should read this. And so that's been really fun to do.

Kim [: 00:35:24

You sound really resourceful.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:35:26

It's been 6 years of podcasting. I've learned so much.

Kim [: 00:35:31

Yeah. And so since we're talking about the book and our closing statement is around, what would you tell women that are in the military or thinking of going into the military or have gotten out of the military? What advice would you give them?

Amanda Huffman [: 00:35:47

So if you're joining the military, I think the most important thing is doing your research and talking to women veterans. If you don't know women veterans, looking listening to podcasts or YouTube videos with, like, interviews like this one where you can hear stories, learn about career fields, learn about the good and the bad so that you know, like, there is bad things happening in the military. And so do a lot of research. You have the Internet because y'all know how lucky you are. And, you also have my book. The Internet is such, like, a cool resource that really didn't exist when both you and I were joining, and so, like, utilize it. And there's women veterans who are, like, so passionate about sharing stories and connecting you with the resources. Like, if someone has a podcast about women veterans, then they're there to help you and you can reach out to them.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:36:38

You don't have to reach out to just me. My wife say a rising tide lifts all boats. So, like, I am so happy that there's other women out there doing this work because, like you said, I'm busy. I can't I can't do it all. And then if you're a woman veteran, you've left the military, get involved in the veteran community. It's really scary in my opinion. It can feel really overwhelming. It's male dominated.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:37:02

So I skip the male dominated. I still do some stuff with veterans at large, but I really like to focus on women veteran organizations, like Women Veteran Alliance by Melissa Washington. She has a conference every other year, and so I try and attend that event because then I get to connect with women veterans. I get to hear their stories. I get to make friends. And make sure you have a LinkedIn profile so you connect with veterans because there are lots of veterans out there helping people, doing stuff for the community, and so LinkedIn is the place to be.

Kim [: 00:37:36

That's all powerful advice, and you're right. Finding a purpose after you get out is so important. So thank you for bringing that up. And thank you for combining, like, your military background with your passion for storytelling to empower women in the armed forces.

Amanda Huffman [: 00:37:52

Thank you. Yeah. I love it. I love getting to do what I do, and I I mean, I love getting to meet new people and connect with people and then help people. I love helping people. So

Kim [: 00:38:03

Yeah. You can tell. You have a very caring soul. Thank you. And thank you again for being on Dog Tag Diaries. I know you're super busy, so taking the time. We really appreciate challenge that comes challenge that comes with sharing and hearing them. Your support in witnessing the experience of our military women is invaluable.

Kim [: 00:38:36

These stories are meant to inspire and provide meaning, and we hope they can help you find your own voice as well.

Dakota [: 00:38:43

If you or anyone you know are in need of immediate help, call the crisis line by dialing 988, then press 1. There are resources available to help and provide guidance during difficult times. Please visit our website, www.reveilleandretreatproject.org, to learn more about the Reveille and Retreat project, including upcoming retreats for military women and resources. The link is in the show notes. We'll be here again next Wednesday. Keep finding the hope, the healing, and the power in community.